Funny how you wait and wait for the inspiration to write to hit and when it finally does you find yourself writing about something completely unexpected. I really don't mean to stir the waters and become controversial but I can't help but want to write about the whole Gay Marriage thing. I know very well that in the circles I travel I am the minority. I wish the use of labels were not needed or mattered much but sadly, at least with me, they are used often and punitively. Case in point, when I dare to stand in the face of traditional values and conservative views and proclaim myself as how I view myself, that being a "Born-Again Gay Christian", I am immediately reprimanded, rebuked, and chastised. I am confronted with immediate opposition from the members of my own church. I am assaulted with people who have a compounding need to correct me.
"There is no such thing as a Gay Christian. You can't be both. It's either one or the other so pick a side."
Or my all-time favorite: "God is not done with you yet. You need healing and deliverance. Once you receive it, you will be free (not to mention Straight)." Well, I guess I haven't learned to receive it. This kind of response always makes me feel like I am at fault. Like I haven't tried hard enough.
Well, I may be in bondage. I am not going to deny this nor do I care to have to defend myself concerning the matter but I resent the thought that I am less than or not complete because I refuse to deny the truth about my sexuality. I refuse to pretend having no sexual and emotional attraction towards men. If I've said it once, I'll say it a million times: " I am exclusively attracted to men which in definition authenticates my labeling myself as Gay". Nor does it matter to me the fact that I have embraced my singleness and am committed to pursuing a vow of celibacy. I am presently celibate not because I believe or consider same sex attraction as inherently evil or unacceptable in the eyes of God. I am intimate with the few and scarce biblical passages forbidding or condemning homosexuality. Even so, I do not ascribe to the beliefs that men who have sex with each other are reprobates or abominable. I do believe wholeheartedly that they, like everyone else, regardless of their sexual preference or orientation, "have all fallen short of the glory of God." Whether we be, Gay, Straight, Bi, Questioning, Transgender, etc. it is my sincere belief we all need a deeper revelation of God's love towards us. Then and only then when we enter into a deep and conscious reality that we were created to love and be loved by a Merciful and Kind God are we able to experience freedom. Simply put, I am celibate because I have come to the place of receiving God's call for my life to enter into a deeper and richer relationship with Him. I say no to sex because for me it only drives me farther apart from experiencing what God has designed for me to experience alongside Him. To be the Bride of Christ in the here and now, as well as in the world to come, is my highest calling. A calling I have come to embrace and cherish in my life's journey.
Part of accepting my call and destiny as a passionate lover of God and His Son is to confront what I believe is the rampant homophobia inherent and prevalent in God's household. The Church needs to heal from its own self-righteous indignation. The pathway to Heaven needs to be cleared away of our preconceived notions. We need to stop interpreting God's mind and heart erroneously and stop shutting the door on the very ones He came to die and rise again for. Enough with the hierarchy of sins!
Recently, a vocal opponent to Gay marriage spoke up and gave his reasons why Gay marriage should not be legalized. While gracious and merciful in his response, he at least made a reconciliatory attempt by conceding to civil unions. In reading his response, I could not help but see why the Gay Rights movement compares itself to the Anti-Slavery and Civil Rights movements of old. The same arguments then are being revived and once again utilized in the defense of strictly heterosexual unions. What was once the battle against racism is now being vehemently fought in the arena of sexism.
I'm not going to pretend that I will even come close to changing anyone's mind overnight. Religious prejudice, as well as centuries old strongly held traditions and practices are never easy to eradicate. Every worthwhile battle in mankind's history has required incredible fortitude and resistance in the face of tyranny and hatred. Jesus himself said it best when he declared how "the kingdom of God suffers violence..." With that said, I would propose to the nay-sayers and unflinching critics of Same Sex Marriage that maybe the time has come to realize that just because we believe something to be absolute truth, God may be challenging and offending our minds and emotions in order to make plain to us all the foolish contents of our hearts. Maybe, just maybe, God is trying to let us know that what we hold fast to and would like nothing better to see imposed upon everyone around us, is in the end better left carried out by the Holy Spirit, the only one who is able to guide and lead us in the path of abiding truth.
I ran across the following blog and found the words spoken by T.D. Jakes echoing my own sentiments regarding this matter. He says plainly:
"Several months ago I had the privilege of appearing again on “Larry King Live.” He asked me a very poignant question, “Is this a Christian nation?” I immediately replied, “No. This is a nation with a lot of Christians in it.” Many times majority groups think that their views control the country, which for me as a Christian is a great idea. But what happens when and if the numbers switch and we aren’t the majority? The founding fathers created a democratic system that separated church from state so that, as a country, we could avoid the slippery slope of getting into the business of telling people what to believe. That is a job they left to be determined by the individual, the synagogue, the mosque and the church!
A country that has one national religion as its only compass is much more of a theocracy than a democracy. That kind of tyranny leads to witch burning, spiritual genocide, forced and fraudulent expressions of faith, and God knows what else. As wonderful as faith is, faith out of control can be lethal.
I love democracy because it is designed to keep the government from telling me when and how to serve communion, and it allows room for debate without dominance. Religious people will never agree on everything within or outside of the bounds of the church. Democracy allows that debate without polluting it further with political intervention as long as that debate doesn’t infringe on another human’s rights. Lately, it is my view that religion has become increasingly a servant to politics, and whenever a flame is needed to move a candidate or party closer to power, they ignite the flame of the faith community by playing on controversial issues and fear. This isn’t new religious jargon; it’s the same lingo that moved the civil rights movement forward. It disannulled the religious language that slave owners used to justify their hideous abuse of African men and women in our history. Communism enforced an atheistic view that denied its citizens the pursuit of an open practice of faith."
To read whole article go to: http://www.tdjenterprises.com/blog/?p=85
We should not fall into the error that our way is the best way. Too many bloody wars and conflicts have been fought in God's name, which in the end brought nothing but shame and disdain for the message of the Cross. I know I am surrounded by passionate men and women who no matter what will hold to their beliefs and even die for them if necessary. So be it. Nonetheless, my ardent prayer is for openness in dialogue. A simple acknowledgment that we are called to love, to love one another and more importantly, to love our enemies. How will people know how great HE is if we, His representatives, insist on going the way of giving God lip service and futile attempts to honor Him with our vain traditions? Will it not only serve to drive away those who are in need of the power of the Cross and the freedom it provides to all who follow? We must learn to love our enemies and stop giving lip service to the often used rhetoric among religious people: "God loves the sinner but hates the Sin". This is just another way of condoning the right to condemn alternative lifestyles and promote tha language of avoidance and deep seated hatred of what we do not understand.
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Good work here Idilio. You've got a real talent here and you speak with conviction. For now, all I'll say is that I support your decision to go celibate. I did this for myself for nearly 10 years and it was one of the best things I could have done as a gay person. I'm not celibate anymore, and guess what? I'm still gay!
ReplyDeleteBlessings Brother. SandyO
If I believed marrige was first, foremost, and primarily a legal institution, and the Bible was indifferent about it, I would have no problem adding my voice to those protesting for the legalization of same-sex marriage. But my best efforts to understand the Bible's view of marriage leads me to conclude that first and foremost God instituted marriage as a sacrament and a covenant between a heterosexual man and a heterosexual woman. Only afterwards did (wo)men added the legal component within the civic realm. The question whether a homosexual may, before God, marry a heterosexual is a poignant one, and I imagine if they were to keep their marriage covenant God would be obeyed and pleased. But I confess not to know with any certainty.
ReplyDeleteBecause God established marriage the way He wished to without regard for our ideas about it, and did so primrily as a spiritual covenant, not a civic law or piece of legislation, as an adherent of the teachings of God I must insist that marriage remain as God originally inaugurated it. If I thought it was practical and Biblically permissible to be simultaneously legally married but NOT covenantally married before God and witnesses, I could assent to same-sex marrige. But I can think of no way to spiritually and practically split that hair and so I remain of the conviction that marriage is first and foremost a God-instituted union, under Godly covenant, between a man and a woman. I also believe strongly -- but can't prove logically apart from my trust in the veracity of the Scriptures -- that for the sake of our obedience to God as a nation with many Christians, and for the sake of the sanctity of our families, marrige should remain the exclusive domain of one man covenanting before God to one woman for life, all the abuses within marriage, and dissolution of marriages notwithstanidng.
But as far as one homosexual (wo)man wanting another homosexual (wo)man with whom s/he has partnered with to be the beneficiary of his/her life insurance, health insurance, or any other civic benefit, I heartily endorse this. In the civic and legislative arena, as far as regultory and legislative benefits go, I endorse legislation allowing homosexuals to bequeath benefits to their partners.